Thursday, November 20, 2008

Put your tiny hand in mine.

It is a known fact amongst me and mine that I'm a sucker for a good theme. Party, movie night.....week of Lifetime Movie Network. Like when they have Going to the Chapel Sunday or Political Intrigue Week around 4th of July. Prepare yourselves children, cause this week's gonna be one for the record books.

A entire week of Made for TV miniseries. The promo said "Because TV movies used to be so awesome that they wouldn't fit in only two hours." I knew where this was going. I hoped and prayed that this was going there. And lo, the television gods did smile down in their omnipotence and grant their lowliest of servants a gift.


You feel dirty and bad and dirty just watching it. And yet, you watch it again. Some more. Contemplate several life choices:

1. Moving to the wilds of Australia and opening a sheep station named after an obscure Irish town.

2. Becoming Catholic.

3. Investing in hot rollers, AquaNet, and a filmy dusty rose (tm) dress.

I could try to explain to you what it's like watching this for the first time. I once attempted to explain the awesome of this masterpiece to someone and apparently it comes off as the pitch for either an episode of Law and Order: SVU or Dateline's To Catch a Predator. You truly have to see it to believe. If you are a reader of the romance novel (not that I am or anything. Shut up!) think back to the first time you read Johanna Lindsey or Nora Roberts or (egads!) Bertrice Small. It's sort of like that. Except everyone's very pretty and Catholic and it's very brown and lots of people die. Just trust me. TiVo this, grab manymany hours worth of snack, and settle in for the fantastic epic journey on which you are about to embark.

He's her lobster. She's his heartsong. They are each other's emperor penguins.

(And while you are watching, try not to think about the fact that Richard Chamberlain would rather schtupp Luke than Meggie. But since I said that that's probably ALL you'll think about.)

Wait, this will clear your mind....... Ahh. That's better.....


Southern Girl said...

You know I freakin' LOVE The Thorn Birds. I mean, it practically sums up the phrase, "Bad. Dirty. HOT." And I blame it entirely for later turning me into a drooling fan-girl that time that Vaughn went undercover as a priest on the episode of Alias that time.

Nada Nada said...

Sally stole my comment.
I'm going to go and pout now.